Say You Love Me Read online

  “So I’m just going to go and finish up an email.” He gave me a grin as he stood in the doorway of the living room and ushered me in. “Have a seat and I’ll be right back.”

  “Oh okay.” I nodded and walked over to his couch and sat down. I looked at him for a few seconds and then back at my lap.

  “Here’s the remote. You can watch some TV if you want.” He handed it to me and our fingers brushed for a few seconds and I felt a secret thrill running through me. I looked up at him to see if he’d felt it too, but he didn’t even look at me.

  “Oh yeah, you want something to drink?” He stopped and looked back at me, his eyes friendly, if nothing else, as he glanced at me. “Sorry, I’m a bad host sometimes.”

  “I’m okay, thanks,” I said as I shook my head. “Plus I know where the kitchen is, so I can help myself if I get thirsty.”

  “Yeah, you can.” He laughed and nodded. “Just don’t go snooping.”

  “What would I go snooping for?” I questioned him, slightly annoyed.

  “Who knows why you and Mila like to snoop?”

  “What are you afraid I’ll find?”

  “Ha, you don’t want to know.” He wiggled his eyebrows at me.

  “I do want to know. That’s why I’m asking.”

  “Big man stuff.” He winked at me.

  “As opposed to little man stuff?” I tilted my head to the side.

  “As opposed to little boy stuff.” He laughed. “I don’t know what a little man is.” He paused. “Well, I know what a little man could be and I’m certainly not a little man.”

  “Okay,” I said, my face turning red at his words. I was pretty sure I knew what he was alluding to and I couldn’t believe that he’d said that to me.

  “Sorry, that was inappropriate.” He laughed. “But yeah, help yourself to whatever you want.”

  “I will.” I nodded. “Does that include all the naughty stuff I find as well?”

  “I can hook you up with some condoms if you think you’ll be in need.” He stared at me then, his eyes curious as he gazed at me.

  “I’m fine, thanks.”

  “Good.” He nodded, more seriously this time, the smile on his face not as huge. “How is your dating life going, anyway?”

  “Great,” I lied. “Almost too many men to keep up with.”

  “So, no one special?” He glanced at me for a second and then looked over my body before looking back at my face.

  “Nope.” I shook my head. Only you, in my dreams.

  “Pity.” He grinned.

  “What about you?” I asked, even though my stomach was in knots waiting for his answer.

  “Dating is fine. No one special, but then I’m not looking for anyone special.” He laughed. “So I’m pretty cool with that.”

  “Yeah.” I smiled at him, not sure if I was happy or sad at his words. Of course I was happy that he didn’t have anyone special, but I was also sad that he didn’t want anyone special. And I wanted to know what he meant by ‘dating was fine’. How many women was he dating? And who were they and what did they look like and how often was he dating them and how much did he like them and oh… I had so many questions, so many things I wanted to know, but didn’t really want to know. I was going to drive myself crazy, just thinking about it.

  “Sally?” He touched my shoulder and I looked up at him in surprise.

  “Yeah?” I asked him, frowning.

  “You seemed to space out. You okay?” He walked over and sat down on the couch.

  “I’m fine.” I nodded. “I thought you needed to work.”

  “It can wait.” He leaned back on the couch. “How are you feeling?”

  “About what?” I gulped. Oh, my God, did he know I was in love with him?

  “Mila and TJ,” he continued. “I’m sure you must be feeling sad now that Mila is spending so much time with TJ. I know you guys used to spend a lot of time together. I mean, I know I barely see TJ now and we used to spend a lot of time together. So I can only imagine what it’s like for you and Mila as you guys were joined at the hip.”

  “Oh, okay, yeah, it’s been hard—different.” I gave him a weak smile. “I mean, I’m so happy for them. I know Mila has wanted to be with TJ for a long time, but now it’s almost like she’s replaced my friendship.”

  “She could never replace your friendship,” Cody said. “You know that, right?”

  “Well, yeah, but you know what I mean. TJ is the first person she goes to now. A lot of our friendship was spent talking about TJ and how much she loved him.” I laughed. “And her being angsty about the relationship, but that’s changed now. She has no need to be angsty about it. She has him and they’re happy and well, it’s just different.”

  “Is that why you’ve been so spacy?” He looked at me in concern. “You really shouldn’t let it bother you so much.”

  “That’s not why I’ve been spacy,” I said, then stopped. “Well, kinda,” I lied. Better for him to think I was worried about my friendship with Mila than for him to know I was obsessed with thinking about him. I definitely didn’t want him to know how much time he spent in my head and dreams. I knew it was almost obsessive and would most likely make him think I was a nutcase. I mean, who was in love with a man who barely knew she existed? I was an idiot and the more I thought about the actual situation, the more I knew that it wasn’t a healthy one to be in. I just didn’t know how to get out of it.

  “Well, you know that I...” Cody’s voice trailed off and he jumped up as the doorbell rang. “Hmm, saved by the bell. That must be them.”

  “Yeah.” I nodded, though I was curious as to what he’d been about to say.

  “We can continue this talk later though, if you want to.” He looked down at me and gave me such a warm look that my heart melted into pieces.

  “Sure,” I said and smiled up at him. How could I not love this man? He was so concerned for my feelings, even though he didn’t love me. God, I wasn’t sure how I was ever going to get over him.

  * * *

  “Sally, you look gorgeous.” Mila hurried into the room and gave me a big hug, her long blond hair cascading down her shoulders, her cheeks bright and her eyes cheery.

  “So do you.” I gave her a huge hug and stared at her. “Being in love agrees with you.”

  “Haha, thanks.” She grinned and looked back at TJ for a few seconds. I watched them exchanging a loving look and I turned away slightly, feeling envious. How horrible was it that I was jealous of my best friend? I was happy that she’d found love, but I was sad for myself. Would I ever find that? And would Cody ever look at me in the way that TJ looked at Mila?

  “So what have you guys been up to?” Mila asked as she looked around the room. “Sorry we’re late. Bad traffic.”

  “No worries.” I shook my head. “We’re were just sitting on the couch, talking.”

  “Oh?” Her eyes brightened and I shook my head slightly, to indicate to her that it wasn’t anything good or exciting.

  “Just about random stuff.” I gave her a quick smile and then leaned in to whisper into her ear, “I think I just need to forget Cody. I don’t think it’s ever going to happen.”

  “Oh Sally.” She chewed on her lower lip. “You don’t know that.”

  “Let’s be realistic. We’re not you and TJ.”

  “You guys could be even better.”

  “Really, Mila?” I laughed. “Is there anything better than you and TJ?”

  “Ha-ha, I don’t know.” She laughed back at me and her eyes were glowing. “I think that would be pretty hard. I mean, we’re pretty awesome.”

  “Yeah, exactly. So if you think you guys are the top, where do me and Cody fit in? We are nowhere on the scale of good. We aren’t even on the scale of bad. We aren’t even on any scale, that’s how pathetic it is.”

  “Oh Sally.” Mila laughed. “Don’t say that, that’s horrible.”

  “It’s horrible, but true.” I started laughing. “It’s pathetic. This whole situation is p
athetic. I don’t even know why I bother.”

  “What are you two laughing about?” Cody looked over at me and gave me a curious look.

  “Nothing much. Mila was just telling a joke,” I said with a smile.

  “About me?” TJ raised his eyebrows at me.

  “Could it be about anyone or anything else? She’s positively obsessed with you.”

  “That’s what I like to hear.” He grinned and walked over to us, leaned down and gave Mila a kiss on the cheek. “All you should be talking about and thinking about is me.”

  “Oh stop with the sap, you two.” Cody shook his head as he walked over and joined us. “I hope tonight is not going to be some public PDA date-night with your two best friends standing awkwardly at the side.”

  “Would we do that?” Mila asked him with a small smile.

  “Yes.” He rolled his eyes. “If I’d known it was going to be some sort of date night, I would have brought a date with me tonight,” he said and my heart sank. I could see Mila’s eyes on me and I knew that she knew just how devastated that comment had made me, but I attempted to keep a small smile on my face.

  “Yeah, me too. I would have brought one of my guys if I’d known,” I lied.

  “Oh? What guys?” Cody looked at me. “Anyone I know?”

  “No.” I shook my head, but inside I was thinking, how would you know some random guy I was dating?

  “Anyone you thinking of getting serious with?” he asked again and I looked at him curiously. Hadn’t I just told him ten minutes ago that I wasn’t seriously dating anyone? Had he not been paying attention?

  “Not really.” I shook my head.

  “Hey, Cody, Mila and I wanted to change. Is it okay if we go in your room?” TJ asked as we just stood there.

  “Sure.” He nodded. “No hanky panky, though.”

  “Cody.” Mila hit him in the shoulder. “You’re so disgusting.”

  “Hey, I know TJ. I wouldn’t put anything past him.”

  “I’m not you.” TJ slapped his friend in the arm. “You’re the dirty dog in this friendship.”

  “Ha-ha, you might be right.” Cody laughed. “Dude, remember that time in Cancun with those two chicks from Georgia?”

  “How can I forget?”

  “Should I be hearing about this?” Mila spoke up, looking slightly annoyed.

  “Hey, it wasn’t me,” TJ said innocently. “It was all Cody.”

  “That, it was.” Cody grinned. “That was a fun night.” He looked at me. “I won’t bore you with the details.”

  “Thanks,” I said, my stomach sinking again. Ugh, I hated hearing stories about Cody with other women. It made me feel so insecure and knots twisted in my stomach that made me want to throw up.

  “Anyway, let’s go and change, TJ. We’ll be right back, guys.” Mila gave me a sympathetic look and they walked out of the room. “We’re going to have a great time tonight racing those fast cars around the track.”

  “Yeah, it’ll be fun.” I nodded and then I looked at Cody and grinned. “You’re going to let me drive first, right?”

  “Hmm, not sure.” He laughed. “Are you a good driver?”

  “I’m an awesome driver.” I gave him a look.

  “I don’t want it to be a bumpy ride.” He tilted his head.

  “It will be a smooth ride.” I rolled my eyes at him and laughed. “I’m a good driver...” I paused as his expression changed. “What?” I looked at him curiously. “What is it you want to say?” I asked again as his eyes grew brighter and he grinned at me.

  Chapter 2

  Cody

  “I can take you on the ride of your life. The smoothest ride ever,” I said and groaned under my breath as I realized that I’d just made a sex joke to my little sister’s best friend. I could see her looking at me with wide brown eyes as she waited for me to say something else. Something that would clarify my statement, like, “I’m an awesome driver and I’m great with cars. Let me drive you around first and it will be the ride of your life.” Of course, I didn’t say that because that wasn’t what I’d meant. She knew it and I knew it, so what was the point of pretending? I wasn’t even sure why the comment had popped into my mind. Maybe it was because she’d been talking about smooth and bumpy rides and I had a dirty mind. As soon as “ride” had been mentioned, all I could think about was her riding me. Which was highly inappropriate. I knew that. But I was also a guy and always had highly inappropriate thoughts. Even about Sally. Not that I’d ever voiced them before, though.

  Normally, I wouldn’t care that I’d made a sexual innuendo. Only, that was with girls I didn’t know. And that I didn’t care about. Sally was different. In a “you’re my sister’s best friend and I’ve known you forever” kind of way. I’m the kind of guy who always gets the girl. Well, at least the majority of the time. I’m also the kind of guy that most girls would call smooth. I’m not going to pretend that I’m not. I’m handsome. Some women call me adorable, some call me hot, many call me sexy. I can’t help it if I’ve been blessed. Only, there are times when I’m not so smooth, not so confident, not so self-assured. It doesn’t happen often, but sometimes, like right now, I said something that was out of place and I regretted it.

  “Sorry, what?” Sally asked, a half-smile on her face. “The ride of my life, huh? What sort of ride could that possibly be?”

  “Sleep with me and you’ll see,” I said teasingly, continuing to go down a road I wasn’t sure I should be going down. I laughed to show her that I wasn’t being serious, though to be honest, I wasn’t really joking. If she said yes, I’d have her in my bedroom in ten seconds flat. Once TJ and Mila exited, of course.

  “What did you say?” The smile on Sally’s face was shocked and slightly unsure. Her brown eyes looked into mine with a confused expression and I burst out laughing as I gazed at her.

  “I’m joking,” I said with a huge grin, trying to pretend that I didn’t really want to rip her clothes off then and there. She chewed on her lower lip and continued to look at me uncertainly. I wanted to lean forward and take her lower lip in my mouth and suck on it. Only, I knew that wasn’t appropriate. Though, I wasn’t sure how appropriate I wanted to be. I’d been appropriate with her our whole lives, so why couldn’t I have some fun with her now? We were both adults, after all.

  “Oh, okay.” She looked at me uncertainly and I worried that maybe I shouldn’t be teasing her like this. Maybe it wasn’t fair. TJ had told me once that he thought Sally had a crush on me, but I didn’t really see it. She’d never tried to hook up with me and I was pretty sure she saw me as a brother. Granted, there had been times when I’d seen her looking at me and batting her eyes, but what did that mean, really? She knew I wasn’t the sort of guy who was looking for a girlfriend, so I was sure she would take my flirting innocently. And if she happened to be down for some no-strings-attached sex, who was I to say no? I mean, if I was completely honest with myself, I had known she’d had a teenage crush on me, but that had seemed to die as soon as it had started. And maybe sometimes I’d wondered if she still liked me. And maybe sometimes I’d wondered what she was doing and if she was dating anyone, but that didn’t mean anything. It didn’t mean I wanted anything from her, aside from some hot sex. And hot sex was not worth risking the friendship or the dynamic we had. And Mila would kill me if I hurt her best friend.

  “Sorry, that was inappropriate. I shouldn’t have gone there.” I gave her my most apologetic smile and bowed my head. “But you know us guys, sometimes we don’t think properly.”

  “That’s okay.” She nodded and gave me a small smile, her face still looking confused.

  “But yeah, you can drive first,” I said to her, trying to diffuse the situation. “I’m sure that you’ll be good and if you’re not, I can show you how it’s done.”

  “Uh huh.” She laughed and shook her head. “Sure you can.”

  “Sure he can what?” Mila walked back into the room and looked at us curiously.

  “I was saying I
don’t need his help driving a car quickly,” Sally said and laughed, throwing her head back, and I watched as her long black hair moved back and forth. She looked at Mila and then she looked at me, her brown eyes gazing into mine softly for a few seconds as she laughed and I was struck at how innocent and youthful she looked. Something in me stirred as I watched her face, and I smiled back at her, unable to stop myself from sharing in her happy moment.

  “Oh yeah, don’t let Cody drive.” Mila laughed and I watched as Sally looked away from me and at her, and the moment was broken. I felt a sense of loss for a few seconds and frowned. I wasn’t sure what that was about.

  “I think I need to eat,” I said and rubbed my stomach. “My head is feeling funny due to lack of food.”

  “I’m hungry myself,” Mila agreed and rubbed her stomach too. “What are we eating? Chinese?”

  “No Chinese tonight.” Sally shook her head. “What about Indian?”

  “I had Indian last night.” I shook my head. “What about Thai?”

  “We had Thai last night.” Mila laughed. “What about Italian?”

  “I can do Italian,” Sally said, and I grinned.

  “Can you now?” I winked at her and she blushed.

  “Cody!” Mila growled at me and laughed. “That was so inappropriate.”

  “I’m an inappropriate guy.” I shrugged. “What can I say?”

  “If you say you’re an Italian stallion, I will slap you.” Mila glared at me and I opened my mouth and winked at her.

  “I’m an Italian…” I paused and looked at Sally. “Well, maybe one day you’ll find out.”

  “Cody.” Sally’s face went bright red and I watched as she started fiddling with her hair. Her nails were painted a bright red and I was curious as to whether her toenails were painted the same hue—so bright and flirty.

  “Yes?” I said with a wink and she just shook her head. I could see Mila and TJ looking at me and I turned to them with a huge grin, knowing I was going to have to answer some questions later if I didn’t slow it down right away. “I’m just joking, guys. Seriously, jeez.” I shook my head and pulled out my phone. “Now, let’s get going, I’ve got to make some calls to some ladies tonight.”