To My Brother's Cocky Best Friend Read online

  “Oh, nice,” Birdy said brightly. “Oh, yeah, Olivia I forgot to tell you, I signed us up for a speed dating event on Friday evening. You can come, right?”

  “Yes, I’ll be there.” I nodded. “I’ll make sure to keep the evening free. Just text me the details, okay?”

  “Awesome!” She did a little dance. “I’m so excited! I’m so excited!”

  “Me too, girl. Me too. Now I just hope we meet two hotties that take our minds off of being single.”

  Though I kept it to myself, I didn’t have much hope. The men I’d met and dated in San Francisco so far left a lot to be desired.

  But maybe this would be the weekend my luck changed.

  Chapter 2

  Tyler

  * * *

  “You upgraded our tickets to first class?” I looked over at Derrick in surprise as we took our seats. “Did you win the lottery and not tell me?”

  “I used my miles.” He shrugged. “No biggie.” He gave me his familiar wide smile and his eyes crinkled in that way they did when he was flirting with women and trying to get them to go home with him.

  “What do you want?” I sighed, knowing he was about to ask me a favor. You don’t get to be a guy's best friend for twenty plus years and not know when he’s going to ask you for something.

  “Remember that girl, Tiffany?”

  “Nope.”

  “The one I met when we were in Miami Beach.”

  “Miami Beach?” I shook my head. “We haven’t been to Miami Beach in ten years.”

  “Yeah, do you remember her? The one that gave me a blow job in the ocean.”

  “I remember her as the one that nearly got you arrested by the Miami PD, yes.”

  “Well, she lives in the Bay Area now, well, in Sonoma, wine country. She works at a winery.”

  “Okay and?” I shrugged. “What does that have to do with me?”

  “Well, we’ve been chatting for the last few months, ever since we connected on Facebook. It’s awesome how Facebook brings you back into contact with old friends.”

  “She’s not your old friend.” I rolled my eyes as I accepted a glass of champagne from the flight attendant. “She’s a girl you banged.”

  “Well, we never officially banged.” He grinned. “At least not yet.”

  “What are you trying to say?” My eyes narrowed. “You’re going to Sonoma while I hang out in SF?”

  “Well, not quite.” He leaned back in his seat. “Man, these seats are so comfortable. Totally worth the additional price.”

  “I thought you used miles?”

  “I lied.”

  “What do you want, Derrick?”

  “Well, Tiffany said that she wants to come and hang out with me. But she doesn’t want to drive home at the end of the night if you get my drift?”

  “Uhm?”

  “And, well, I said she can stay with me.”

  “You what? What about me?”

  “You can get another room or you can stay with Olivia.”

  “Olivia already told us no.”

  “Well, she told us no. Maybe she’ll say yes to just you.”

  “Your sister hates me. Always has. I do not want to stay with her,” I said the words jokingly because I didn’t want Derrick to know how much I wanted to stay with her. I’d tease the shit out of her and rile her up. It would be amazing.

  “Olivia and you need to get over it.” Derrick rolled his eyes. “There’s enough of me to go around.”

  “Dude, if you think that—”

  The flight attendant stopped by our seats again. “Would either of you two gentlemen like a refill of champagne before we take off?” She licked her lips as she looked down at us. I just shook my head and she continued down the aisle.

  “She was totally into you,” Derrick whispered. “Looks like you can join the mile-high club if you want.”

  “I don’t want to, thank you very much.” At least not with her.

  “Your loss.” He pressed the screen in front of him. “Think I might watch a movie to pass the time.”

  “Yeah, I have some work to do myself.” I had a stack of paperwork to go through. Three of my cases were set to go to trial and unless we settled within the next couple of weeks, the next few months were going to be absolutely crazy. I had my legal assistant drafting up some briefs while I went over case law for the most important case. The partners at my law firm wanted to make sure we won because the client was being sued on a few other developments and we wanted to represent his contracting company on all of them.

  “Sounds boring.” Derrick laughed as I yawned. “I still cannot believe you’re a commercial real estate litigator.”

  “I still can’t believe you’re a financial advisor.”

  “Well, you weren’t complaining when I doubled your dividend profits last year.”

  “Yeah, well, I never said you weren’t good,” I replied. “So, is this thing with Tiffany a go or just a potential?”

  “It’s a go.” Derrick’s smile widened. “She’s actually picking us up from the airport.”

  “So basically, I’m out on my ear.”

  “Nah, you can come back with us to the hotel. We’re meeting Olivia for dinner, so hopefully, we can guilt her into letting you stay.”

  “Yeah, or you’ll be paying for my new room.” I laughed at his look on his face. Derrick hated having to part with money more than anything in the world.

  “Olivia will let you stay,” Derrick assured me. “In fact, I’ll have her begging you.”

  “I wouldn’t mind seeing her beg,” I said smoothly, though the sort of begging I wanted her to do was not something I would tell Derrick about. Shit, if he had any clue how dirty my thoughts were about his sister, my teeth would be on the ground and my blue eyes would be black. “But why did you invite me to come on this trip if you were just going to use it to hook up?”

  “I didn’t know that Tiffany was looking for a chocolate Adonis when I convinced you to come.” He shrugged. “You know you’re my bro, but I’m not just going to tell her no.”

  “So much for bros before hoes.” I shook my head. “Nice bro, nice.”

  “Maybe Olivia will have some cute friends for you to hook up with.”

  “Maybe. So is Olivia seeing anyone?” Smooth one, Tyler.

  “No idea. She doesn’t tell me those things.”

  “Oh, okay.”

  “She knows better than to tell me about any guys unless she’s engaged and about to get married.” He chuckled. “And then he will have to answer to me, my dad, my granddad, and my uncles, and you know how hardcore they all are.”

  “Yup, that I do.” They would all kill me if they knew the thoughts I’d had about Olivia. Maybe that was why I’d always kept it a secret that I’d had a thing for her since high school. A small crush wasn’t worth losing my best friend for. “I’d kill any guy that messed with her as well.”

  “Yeah, I know. You’re her honorary big brother.” Derrick nodded, pleased. “That’s why she can’t say no when we tell her you have nowhere else to go.”

  “I don’t think Olivia will have any problem saying no. I’ll just have to see if I can change her mind.”

  I grinned to myself as I unbuckled my seatbelt to stand up and get my laptop from my suitcase in the overhead department. Maybe I could change Olivia’s mind about a few things.

  Chapter 3

  Olivia

  * * *

  “Only my brother and Tyler could come to San Francisco, the city by the Bay, and want to get burgers for dinner,” I muttered to myself as I hurried down Market Street to the BART station on Powell Street. Derrick had made a reservation for a place in the Mission, and I had about twenty minutes to get there. “I don’t even know any burger places in the Mission.”

  “Hey, there pretty lady, you got a twenty?” A man standing on the corner leered at me as I passed him by. I made eye contact and immediately cursed myself internally. Never make eye contact.

  “Sorry, no.”
Shit, why did I speak to him?

  “Where are you going?” The man approached me now and the stench of urine filled my nostrils.

  I kept my head down. I didn’t want the man following me all the way to Mission. I felt slightly guilty about ignoring him. I knew the homeless situation in San Francisco was out of control, but I also knew that a lot of drug addicts also hung out in the Tenderloin and around Union Square, and they could get nasty if they felt you were dissing them in any way. I increased my pace and hurried to catch the train. I was already in a bad mood and I didn’t need it to get worse. I touched my hair as I walked down the stairs. It was a frizzy hot mess due to the light rain that had fallen as I’d been walking.

  “What a waste of money.” A hundred and fifty dollars for a blowout and my hair was now frizzier than when I’d gone to the hairdressers. I only hoped that Derrick and Tyler were on their best behavior because if they said anything that got on my nerves, it was going to go down.

  “Sis, there you are, looking as Mad Max-esque as ever.” Derrick gave me a huge hug and a kiss on the cheek. “How have you been?”

  “I got caught in the rain.” I laughed as I hugged him back. I was used to his insults and didn’t mind them. “I’m glad you made it. I missed you.”

  “I missed you too.” He rubbed the top of my head. “Come and say hello to Tyler and my friend.”

  “What friend?” I frowned. How had he made a new friend already? I knew people liked him, but this was ridiculous. He’d only been in town for about an hour.

  “Hey, Olivia.” Tyler and all six foot three of his well-built muscular frame stepped forward. “Good to see you.” His eyes swept over my body and a smirk crossed his face. “Looking as good as ever.”

  I gave him a hug. “Hello, wannabe Ken Doll.”

  His blue eyes danced in at my childhood diss. “Good to see you as well, chocolate Barbie.”

  “I’m not chocolate Barbie.” I rolled my eyes. “That’s offensive.”

  “Why? Because I called you Barbie?”

  “No, yes, no. Ugh, I don’t know.” I stepped back from him. “I am not going to let you rile me up on this trip.”

  “Can I rile you down instead?”

  “You can’t rile me anywhere.”

  “Want to bet?” He winked. I turned a long-suffering expression on Derrick, who was grinning at us both.

  “Just like old times. I’ve missed this.”

  “I haven’t.” I walked away from Tyler, ignoring my erratically beating heart. “Who is this new friend you want me to meet?”

  “I’m not new,” said a high squeaky voice, and a girl popped out from behind my brother’s big muscular body. He’d been a tight end in college for FSU and still had his husky build.

  My jaw dropped as I took in the woman standing in front of me. She was wearing a crop top that bared her midriff, a flowery red skirt, and high heels. Did she not know we were in San Francisco in December? Her long bleach-blonde hair was ratty, and I had a feeling she had in really cheap extensions. “Who are you?”

  “I’m Tiffany. You must be Derrick’s sister, Olive Oyl.”

  “Olivia.” I gave my brother a look which he returned with his usual goofy grin.

  “Derrick and I met in Miami Beach when he was down there with his football team. I was there with my cheerleader friends from Alabama.” She giggled and looked over at Derrick. “I guess we hit it off like a house on fire because here we are over ten years later and still bursting with sexual chemistry.”

  It took everything I had in me to not roll my eyes. Was I being pranked? Had Derrick and Tyler plotted this on the plane to make me think I was losing my mind?

  Tyler came up behind me and whispered in my ear. “Close your mouth, Olivia. You’re attracting flies, and you don’t want to swallow one.”

  I glanced up at him. “I might like that.”

  “True, you do fit the narrative of that one rhyme.”

  “What rhyme?”

  “You know the one…I know an old lady who swallowed a fly, I don’t know why she swallowed the fly, perhaps she’ll die.”

  “Hmm okay, not flattered.”

  “Maybe when you hear the rest. I know an old lady that swallowed a spider that wiggled and jiggled and tickled inside her. She swallowed the spider to catch the fly, I don’t know why she swallowed the fly, perhaps she’ll die.”

  “Very funny.” I couldn’t stop myself from smiling. “You and Derrick still haven’t grown up.”

  “You, on the other hand …” He looked me up and down again. “You’re all woman.”

  I could feel the heat in my cheeks as he stared at me admiringly. “Derrick is right there,” I said in a low voice.

  “I’m so happy to meet you, Olivia. You kinda remind me of Olivia Pope, from that TV show Scandal,” Tiffany spoke up again. “You look just like her.”

  “Oh, not really, but thanks. I love that show.” I wanted to ask her if every black woman looked the same to her, but I kept my mouth shut. I knew Derrick would kill me if I said anything like that.

  “True,” she said with a sweet smile. “You don’t really look like her. You’re much prettier. I suppose I just said that because you have the same name.” Tiffany seemed a bit flustered and I wondered if maybe I had judged her a bit too harshly.

  I managed a polite smile. “So, you’re from California? Or Florida as well?”

  “I’m an Alabama girl. Country through and through.”

  “Yet you live in San Francisco?” I raised an eyebrow. “Hated the country?”

  “No, I love the country. I live in Sonoma County. I work at a winery.”

  “Oh, wow! Cool.” What the hell was she doing here then, if she lived in Sonoma?

  “Yeah, it’s better than my days on the pole.”

  “You worked at the polls? For elections?”

  “No, I worked on the pole.” She grinned and pressed her boobs together. “Lap dances and stuff.”

  “Okay now, Tiffany.” Derrick put his arm around her shoulder. “Shall we go and get our food? We have a reservation.”

  “Yay for burgers.” Sarcasm dripped from my lips. “The food of kings and queens.”

  Tyler chuckled as we walked into the restaurant. “King Tyler has a certain ring to it.”

  “Isn’t esquire enough?” Derrick held the door open for all of us.

  “Oh, is Tyler a prince?” Tiffany asked, her eyes wide. “I’ve never met a prince before.”

  “He’s a lawyer. Not a prince.” Was this girl a complete ditz? Why was Derrick into her? Actually, I knew the answer to that: she was a pretty girl with big boobs. I knew Derrick well enough to know that was enough for him to be attracted to a girl.

  “So, Olivia, how do you know Derrick and Tyler again?” Tiffany asked me as we all sat down.

  I shot Derrick a look of utter disbelief. Hadn’t this girl just asked me if I was Derrick’s sister? I still wasn’t convinced I wasn’t on a TV show. Derrick ignored me so I turned back to Tiffany. “From the circus,” I told her. “I used to walk the tightrope, and they were the freak show duo.”

  “Wow, that’s so cool.”

  I turned my face away to stop myself from laughing and I could see Tyler’s lips twitching as well. Derrick was starting to look furious, though. He never did have a good sense of humor.

  “Olivia is my sister, remember, Tiffany?”

  “Oh, yes.” There went the giggle again.

  Who did she think she was? Marilyn Monroe? Already, I was looking forward to telling the girls at work about her tomorrow. I knew they would enjoy the story.

  “I suppose my head is all a-fluster, seeing you again, Derrick. I’d forgotten how handsome you were.”

  Gag me with a knife, already.

  “What about you, Olivia?” Tyler looked over at me.

  “What about me what?”

  “Had you also forgotten how handsome I was as well?”

  “I suppose you were pretty handsome for the freak show.” I
grinned. “It’s a pity that you have a third nipple in the middle of your chest, with long grey hairs on it.”

  “That didn’t stop you from playing with it all night long.”

  “Okay, guys.” Derrick held up his hands. “Play nice for once. Ignore them, Tiffany. Olivia and Tyler have been acting like this since before I can remember. You know how it can be with immature members of the opposite sex. They’re always arguing.” Derrick gave me a pointed look. “I hope you’re not going to keep this up for the entire trip.”

  “Derrick, you’re not my dad. I am a twenty-seven-year-old woman. I can do and say what I want to, and you have no power to tell me otherwise.”

  “I dare you to say that to Mom and Dad.”

  “Are you crazy?” I laughed and then my stomach growled. “Let’s order some burgers and beers. I am beyond hungry right now.”

  “You’re talking my language.” Tyler picked up the menus and handed them to us.

  The waitress approached the table and smiled at Derrick and then me. “You guys are such a cute couple.”

  Derrick threw his head back and laughed as he motioned his arms around the table. “We’re not a couple. This table is full of the jungle fever. The ebony and ivory, if you will.”

  “Derrick!” I groaned. “He’s my brother and we’re all just friends. Can you give us a few minutes to look at the menus, please?”

  “Oh, sure. I’ll be back,” she said and then walked away.

  “Derrick, really?” I rolled my eyes. “You’re in San Francisco now, you can’t say those things!”

  “Why not? Are the PC police going to lock me up?” He shook his head. “This is why I would never live in California. I can’t stand having to watch every little thing I say.”

  “Uh huh.” I knew better than to engage him on the subject because as soon as you made a comment he was off to the races and he wouldn’t let up for hours. “So, Tyler how was the plane ride?”

  “Uneventful. I did some work.” He opened his menu. “Oh, yeah, my mom and dad send their love.”